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Load image into Gallery viewer, A green book that reads &quot;Festive as F*ck - Hilariously Irreverent Cross-Stitch for the Holidays&quot; set against a background of white holiday lights. The book features a circular cross-stitch piece that reads &quot;Merry Drunk I&#39;m Christmas&quot; in red.

Load image into Gallery viewer, A green book cover that reads &quot;Festive as F*ck - Hilariously Irreverent Cross-Stitch for the Holidays&quot; and features a circular cross-stitch piece that reads &quot;Merry Drunk I&#39;m Christmas&quot; in red.

Load image into Gallery viewer, A two-page spread from the book. Black text lists the book&#39;s table of contents. Various cross-stitch projects are around the text.

Load image into Gallery viewer, A two-page spread from the book. On the left is black text saying &quot;it&#39;s the most wonderful f&amp;#k%*g time of the year!&quot; Under the title is description of the book. On the right is a cross-stitch project with red and green text saying &quot;deck the halls and not your family fa la la la la, la la, la, la.&quot; Behind the project is a red background with berries and leaves.

Load image into Gallery viewer, A two-page spread from the book. On the left is black text with an introduction to the book. On the right is a white circular cross stitch project, with red text saying merry drunk, I&#39;m Christmas. At the bottom is white text saying &quot;hilariously irreverent cross-stitch for the holidays. Behind the project is a christmas wreath.

Load image into Gallery viewer, A two-page spread from the book. On the left is a cross-stitch project with red, blue, and green text saying &quot;it&#39;s that wonderful time of the year when I switch from my everyday anxiety to my fancy holiday anxiety.&quot; On the right are instructions to build the project.

Festive As F*ck: Cross-Stitch For The Holidays!

INVENTORY IS LOW AS F*CK!

$22.99
$25.99

Taxes calculated at checkout. Shipping calculated at checkout.

Who’s ready for the holidays? Not us! Grab your needle & thread and get ready to stab away the stress of the holidays with this collection of festive f*cking patterns, and maybe even make a few gifts to boot!

Let’s face it, the holidays can be stressful. When the peppermint latte won’t cut it, you might find yourself in need of something to stab. A LOT. Now, you can release your holiday anxiety with some truly irreverent and silly sentiments, and make a couple of presents in the process! Featuring 20 patterns from the crafting world’s most bad-ass cross-stitchers, this book has everything from a simple “Ho” ornament to a sampler featuring Clark Griswold’s famous “Hallelujah, holy shit, where’s the Tylenol?”

There is no previous experience required here! In addition to simple instructions and clear, easy-to-follow patterns, you get a basic lesson in cross-stitch technique, so anyone can make these designs. Stitch your stress away with a little “Hello Drunk, I’m Christmas” for your tree, or make a “Deck the Halls and Not Your Family” for your sibling.

And above all, have a Happy F*cking Holiday!

Patterns created by some of the f*cking best-selling cross-stitch designers and influencers on Etsy

Festive As F*ck includes 20 hilariously sassy patterns to help ease the stress of the holiday season

With simple instructions and clear and easy-to-follow patterns, even a novice potty-mouth can enjoy this filthy holiday fun

Full-color images of the finished projects help ensure success and offer ideas of how to frame and display your festive artwork

Make the best f*cking gifts of the season with hilarious and irreverent cross stitch designs that will make anyone laugh their ass off.

Festive As F*ck: Cross-Stitch For The Holidays! orders
will ship approximately 10-14 business days after your order is placed. If your order also includes a backordered item, your order won't ship until all items are available.
The postal services are all experiencing increased demands due to the holiday shipping season. As a result, orders may encounter slowdowns or delays in transit.